Killer Hot Dogs.

images-1Inside Edition” has mastered the art of leaving their viewing audience with the most nail-biting cliffhangers before commercial breaks.

Take tonight for example:

Deborah Norville announced, with her most serious and professional, fake news anchor voice, “Still ahead on Inside Edition:  What you don’t know, could kill you!   Stay tuned to see why hot dogs are extremely dangerous…”

Sadly I was unable to stay tuned because my client, Joe, pooped his pants during the commercial break.

Thanks a lot Joe, now that I still don’t know about the horrible dangers that lay in wait for me, I may end up getting killed by a villainous hot dog!

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The Library.

I called my Mom yesterday to have a chat.  She answered my call, but apparently she was at the library because she whispered through the whole conversation.

Mom:  “Hello?”

Me:  “Hi Mom.  What are you up to?”

Mom:  “I’m at the library.”

Me:  “Huh?”

Mom:  “I’m at the library so I have to be quiet.”

Me:  “So why did you answer your phone if you’re at the library?”

Mom:  “Cuz I know that you hate it when I don’t answer my phone.”

Me:  “Well yeah, that’s true.  What the heck are you doing at the library anyway?  You never go there!”

Mom:  “I’m renting books, what do you think?”

Me:  “Well jeez Mom!  You don’t have to get snippy.”

Mom:  “Shhhhhh!”

Me:  “Mom, what the heck?  Did you just shush me?  I’m not the one at the library!”

Mom:  “Shhhhh.  I’ve gotta go.”

Me:  “Okay, nice chattin’ with ya…”

Mom:  “Yeah shhhh gotta go.”

Me:  “Stop shushing me!”

Mom:  “Love you.”

Me:  “Love you too, Mom.  And will you PLEASE stop being so LOUD?!”

Click.

Well, at least she answered her phone I guess?